The Law of Garbage Truck - by David J. Pollay

How often do you let other people's nonsense change your mood?  Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss, or an insensitive employee ruin your day?  Unless you're the Terminator, you're probably set back on your heels.  However, the mark of your success is how quickly you can refocus on what's important in your life. Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson.  And I learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here's what happened.

 

I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station.  We were driving in the right lane when all of a sudden, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us.  My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, the car skidded, the tires squealed, and at the very last moment our car stopped just one inch from the other car's back-end.

 

I couldn't believe it.  But then I couldn't believe what happened next.  The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad words at us.  How do I know?  Ask any New Yorker, some words in New York come with a special face.  And for emphasis, he threw in a one finger salute, as if his words were not enough.

 

But then here's what really blew me away.  My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly.  So, I said, "Why did you just do that!?  This guy could have killed us!"  And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, "The Law of the Garbage Truck™."  He said:

 

Many people are like garbage trucks.  They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment.  As their garbage piles up, they look for a place to dump it.  And if you let them, they'll dump it on you.

 

So when someone wants to dump on you, don't take it personally.  Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on.  Believe me.  You'll be happier.

 

So I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me?  And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the street?  It was then that I said, "I don't want their garbage and I'm not going to spread it anymore."

 

I began to see Garbage Trucks.  Like in the movie "The Sixth Sense," the little boy said, "I see Dead People."  Well now "I see Garbage Trucks."  I see the load they're carrying.  I see them coming to dump it.  And like my taxi driver, I don't take it personally; I just smile, wave, wish them well, and I move on.

 

One of my favourite football players of all time is Walter Payton.  Every day on the football field, after being tackled, he would jump up as quickly as he hit the ground.  He never dwelled on a hit.  Payton was ready to make the next play his best.  Over the years the best players from around the world in every sport have played this way:  Tiger Woods, Nadia Comaneci, Muhammad Ali, Bjorn Borg, Chris Evert, Michael Jordan, and Pele are just some of those players.  And the most inspiring leaders have lived this way:  Nelson Mandela, Mother Theresa, Gandhi, and Martin Luther King.

 

See, Roy Baumeister, a psychology researcher from Florida State University, found in his extensive research that you remember bad things more often than good things in your life.  You store the bad memories more easily, and you recall them more frequently.

 

So the odds are against you when a Garbage Truck comes your way.  But when you follow The Law of the Garbage Truck™, you take back control of your life.  You make room for the good by letting go of the bad.

 

The best leaders know that they have to be ready for their next meeting.  The best sales people know that they have to be ready for their next client.  And the best parents know that they have to be ready to welcome their children home from school with hugs and kisses, no matter how many garbage trucks they might have faced that day.  All of us know that we have to be fully present, and at our best for the people we care about.

 

The bottom line is that successful people do not let Garbage Trucks take over their lives.

 

What about you?  What would happen in your life, starting today, if you let more garbage trucks pass you by?

 

Here's my bet:  You'll be happier.

 

You have a choice.  Make it today.

 

Have a Garbage Free Day! ™

Your belief window

Quoted from  the Gems of Wisdom <iskblr1@gmail.com> mailing list

Your belief window

We don't see things as they are; we see things as we are. You may not be aware of this little-known but highly important part of your person that affects many of the decisions you make and how you behave in different situations. It is your Belief Window.

You cannot actually see your Belief Window because it's invisible, but we all have one. It is figuratively attached to your head and hangs in front of your face. Every time you move, that window goes with you. You look at the world through it, and what you see is filtered back to you through it.

Your Belief Window is always there with you, filtering what you see - the oceans of data and information helping you make sense of the world around you. It influences the way you perceive others, the way you read situations, and the feelings you have about yourself.

The tricky thing about the Belief Window is that you have placed perceptions on it which you believe are absolutely true, whether they reflect reality or not. For example, your experiences and social feedback may have caused you to believe that you are smart, stupid, beautiful, ugly, competent, incompetent, creative, or dull - regardless of whether they are true. And because you believe them you unquestioningly act as though they are. That's why changing our behavior is sometimes such a difficult task.

Until we realize that we view the world through our Belief Windows and that it constantly filters our experiences, we will continue to think that we see life "as it really is."

One of the most important things we can do is to make sure our Belief Window is as clear as possible and truly reflects the reality. This may be the most difficult thing to do. You will probably have to swallow your pride, and admit that you do have a Belief Window that affects much of what you do, and recognize that some of the things you've placed on it are incorrect. In doing so, you will have achieved the critical first step in freeing yourself from erroneous self-ideas that may be impeding your progress.

Mistakes are opportunities

This is a story about a famous research scientist who had made several very important medical breakthroughs. He was being interviewed by a newspaper reporter who asked him why he thought he was able to be so much more creative than the average person. What set him so far apart from others?

 

He responded that, in his opinion, it all came from an experience with his mother that occurred when he was about two years old. He had been trying to remove a bottle of milk from the refrigerator when he lost his grip on the slippery bottle and it fell, spilling its contents all over the kitchen floor—a veritable sea of milk!

 

When his mother came into the kitchen, instead of yelling at him, giving him a lecture, or punishing him, she said, "Robert, what a great and wonderful mess you have made! I have rarely seen such a huge puddle of milk. Well, the damage has already been done. Would you like to get down and play in the milk for a few minutes before we clean it up?"

 

Indeed, he did. After a few minutes, his mother said, "You know, Robert, whenever you make a mess like this, eventually you have to clean it up and restore everything to its proper order. So, how would you like to do that? We could use a sponge, a towel, or a mop. Which do you prefer?" He chose the sponge and together they cleaned up the spilled milk.

 

His mother then said, "You know, what we have here is a failed experiment in how to effectively carry a big milk bottle with two tiny hands. Let's go out in the back yard and fill the bottle with water and see if you can discover a way to carry it without dropping it." The little boy learned that if he grasped the bottle at the top near the lip with both hands, he could carry it without dropping it. What a wonderful lesson!

 

This renowned scientist then remarked that it was at that moment that he knew he didn't need to be afraid to make mistakes. Instead, he learned that mistakes were just opportunities for learning something new, which is, after all, what scientific experiments are all about. Even if the experiment "doesn't work," we usually learn something valuable from it

Choose your battles wisely

"Choose your battles wisely" is important in living a happy and contented life. It suggests that life is filled with opportunities to choose between making a big deal out of something or simply letting it go, realizing it doesn't really matter. If you choose your battles wisely, you'll be far more effective in winning those that are truly important.

Certainly there will be times when you will want or need to argue, confront, or even fight for something you believe in. Many people, however, argue, confront, and fight over practically anything, turning their lives into a series of battles over relatively small issues. There is so much frustration in living this type of life that you lose track of what is truly relevant.

The tiniest disagreement or glitch in your plans can be made into a big deal if your goal (conscious or unconscious) is to have everything work out in your favor.

The truth is, life is rarely exactly the way we want it to be, and other people often don't act as we would like them to. Moment to moment, there are aspects of life that we like and others that we don't. There are always going to be people who disagree with you, people who do things differently, and things that don't work out. If you fight against this principle of life, you'll spend most of your life fighting battles.

A more peaceful way to live is to decide consciously which battles are worth fighting and which are better left alone.

A higher power is at work in our lives

A higher power is at work in our lives

The only survivor of a shipwreck was washed up on a small, uninhabited island. He prayed feverishly for God to rescue him, and every day he scanned the horizon for help, but none seemed forthcoming.

Exhausted, he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood to protect himself from the elements, and to store his few possessions. But then one day, after scavenging for food, he arrived home to find his little hut in flames, the smoke rolling up to the sky.

The worst had happened - everything was lost. He was stunned with grief and anger.

"God, how could you do this to me?" he cried.

Early the next day, however, he was awakened by the sound of a ship that was approaching the island. It had come to rescue him.

"How did you know I was here?" asked the weary man of his rescuers.

"We saw your smoke signal", they replied.

It's easy to get discouraged sometimes when things appear to be going badly. But we shouldn't lose heart, because a higher power is at work in our lives, even in the midst of pain and suffering.

Remember, next time your little hut is burning to the ground, it just may be a smoke signal that summons the grace of that higher power.

Expectations and Frustrations

Expectations and Frustrations

We have to understand the link between our expectations and our frustration levels. Whenever we expect something to be a certain way and it isn't we're upset and we suffer.

On the other had, when we let go of our expectations, when you accept life as it is, we're free. To hold on is to be serious and uptight. To let go is to lighten up.

A good exercise is to try to approach a single day without expectations. Don't expect people to be friendly. When they're not, you won't be surprised or bothered. If they are, you'll be delighted.

Don't expect your day to be problem free. Instead, as problems come up, say to yourself, "Ah, another hurdle to overcome." As you approach your day in this manner you'll notice how graceful life can be.

Rather than fighting against life, pretty soon, with practice, you'll lighten up your entire life.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year again!!

A fantastic message from Sri Sri this new year -  Jan 1st/2011

The year gone by has taught us many lessons; what we should be doing and what we should not. Every pain that we went through in 2010 brought us some depth, and all the joy and pleasure gave us a new vision of life and hope for the future. Welcome 2011 with a genuine smile, and reflect the true sign of the prosperity that lies inside. Here are 11 ways to do that.

1) Identify your limitations: Every time you are unhappy or miserable, you are just coming in touch with your own boundaries! It is a test of the moment, when you come in touch with your limitations, your boundaries. Turn the whole situation into a prayer. Just feel thankful and say, "My Lord, You made me aware of my boundaries.  You bring peace.  I am giving it all to You." That very moment you will start smiling. However hopeless the situation is, you will walk through it, sing through it, dance through it!

2) Feel that "I am blessed": There is so much talk about success. Have you ever thought what success is? Success is simply ignorance about one's capabilities, about the power of the self. Because you assume you can do only this much. If you feel the obstacle is too much, deep prayer can work miracles. Know that failures are stepping stones for greater success.  The feeling that "I am blessed" can help you overcome any failure. Once you realise that you are blessed, then all the complaints, grumbling, insecurities, a sense of not being loved or wanting love disappears. There is a saying: Behind every successful man is a woman. I will modify this to- Behind every success there is the Divine saying "I am behind you".

  3) Implement changes if needed: Sorrow simply means that viveka (discrimination) is overshadowed. Viveka means knowing that everything is changing. Your body, your emotions, the people around you and the world-everything is changing. Time and again you have to awaken to this reality. You are often fearful of change. You know there is a need for change to improve your life, but you feel secure in the old pattern. You have to see whether that gives you short-term joy and misery in the long run or short-time pain and joy in the long run. So, use your intelligence and have the courage to implement changes whenever it is necessary. 

4) Communicate effectively: Learning to communicate effectively with everyone is a skill worth possessing. Communicating without prejudice is vital for success. If you are faced with someone who knows more than you, be like a child and keep your ears and eyes open for learning. If you are faced with someone who knows less than you, be humble and strive to make them as good as or better than you. Play with a small child as you played when you were a child. Talk with an elderly person remembering that one day you will be like that. Communicate with a person of your age group like you are his/her best friend. When you are centred, you become a powerful communicator. And when your communication improves, your life improves

 5) Don't be afraid to make mistakes: Your knowledge of a mistake comes to you when you are innocent! Mistakes of the past are past. When this knowledge comes, you are again perfect. Knowledge of the self, truth and skills can bring out the best in you. So, don't be afraid to make mistakes, but don't repeat the same mistakes. You have got to be innovative even in your mistakes!

6) Do not lose your friends: To correct mistakes you need authority and love. Authority and love seem to be contradictory, but in reality they are not. Authority without love is stifling. Love without authority is shallow.  When you allow room for mistakes, you can be both authoritative and sweet. That is how the Divine is, the right balance of both. A magnanimous person will not pick on the mistakes of others and make them feel guilty; he will correct them with compassion and care.

 7) Have a sense of humour: You are endowed with certain naughtiness as a child. Keep it alive. Humour will grease all tough situations. One who has humour can sail through any conflict. Humour is the buffer that saves you from humiliation. If you refuse to be humiliated, you become invincible. Humour brings everyone together, while humiliation tears them apart. In a society torn with humiliation and insult, humour is like a breath of fresh air. Humour should be coupled with care and concern because humour without wisdom is shallow. Humour is not just words; it is the lightness of your being.

8) Dream the impossible: Unless you have a dream, you cannot realise it. Every invention has come out of a dream.  Dream the impossible. We are all born in this world to do something wonderful and unique so give yourself the freedom to dream and think big. Have the courage and determination to achieve those dreams that are dear to you. Many a time people who dreamt big were ridiculed, but they remained strong to achieve their goals. Do something creative. Not a year should pass without doing something creative.

   9) Overcome your prejudice: Your prejudice against gender, religion, caste and class does not allow you to mingle with everyone around you.  Often, you don't sit with people who are not economically or socially at par with you. You have to learn to break that barrier. Also, there is age prejudice. Teenagers don't like to have fun with elderly people and vice versa. Gender prejudice is more prevalent in rural areas. Caste and Religious prejudice is well known. There are good people and bad people in every community, religion and every section of society. Don't be prejudiced against them.  At the same time don't be shy about your identity. When you overcome prejudice, you will be very natural, and your quality of life will improve.

 10) Better the world around you: Today, most people are confused because there is no direction in life. The way to overcome personal misery is to share universal misery! The way to expand personal joy is to share universal joy. Instead of thinking "what about me?" and "what can I gain from this world?", think "what can I do for the world?" Make a commitment to make this world a better place to live. Greater the commitment you take, greater the energy, power and resources will come to you.

11) Compare your performance: As we flip the calendar, we need to keep flipping our mind as well. Often, our diaries are full with memories. See that you don't fill your future dates with past events. Allow the space for creativity to dawn. Turn back and remember the whole year. Do not run away from anything. Do not reject anything. Do not go away from anything. At the same time, let your attention be on the self. This is a delicate balance. Review the year while you celebrate. Learn and unlearn from the past, and move on.
 Let the New Year bring into our life a determination to create a violence-free, stress-free society. Don't feel shy to speak about human and spiritual values. Take this decision: "Whatever happens I will be grounded, I will never go down. God's protection is there on me." Keep your mind in peace in all situations. The rest will be taken care of. May your life be filled with peace, joy and happiness! Happy New Year!




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